I arrived at the office yesterday in an even more positive mood than usual … despite the last bout of ‘prodding’ of my problematic back leading rather ominously to another scan, the results had pointed to exercise as being the way forward – rather than, as I had feared, a more drastic solution involving the words ‘hammer’ and ‘chisel’…
However, when I ventured further into HQ, I found my ‘Head Minion’ simultaneously both shaking and scratching his head, with his face bearing the same kind of expression you usually see after the reading of a particularly cringeworthy joke from a Christmas cracker…
We had been asked, by another marketer, to promote their latest ‘launch’ … and amongst all the details about how the best affiliates could win holidays and flat screen TVs (but unsurprisingly very little about the merits if the product itself) was a swipe file of ‘killer’ emails we could send out to, apparently, ‘really crush it’ (which I’m told means do really well).
However, it would seem that the only killing and crushing involved would be damage that sending out this type of nonsense will do to the relationship with the people on your email list, because the contents of this swipe file approximated to four lines that read something like…
Newbie makes $42,000 in first 3 days online…
click here to find out how
see the real proof now
click here now
…there may have also been something about ‘shocking truth’ or ‘this is what the gurus don’t want you to know’ in the ‘variations’ to send out on subsequent days – but that was about it.
Now I know that the myriad of email writing courses online will tell you to write as if you were writing to a ‘5th Grader’ (which I’m told is about 10 years old) and these emails are written to just ‘get the click’ and send you to the sales page where the real selling is done … but when I receive an email that talks to me like I’m some kind of halfwit, I tend to hit the delete button – and I wouldn’t blame you for doing exactly the same – even if you WERE 10 years old.
To compound the felony, even if you’re only on half the mailing lists I’m on, you’ll probably receive three or four of these emails, all from different marketers, all saying the same thing, all insulting your intelligence … now what does this tell you about the value they place on their relationship with you?
You can, if you really have to, use some of the better emails of this type to form the absolute bare bones of your own efforts, and then inject your own personality (and quite a bit of substance) to say what it is you like about the product, and why you think it may be of benefit to the reader. (Of course if you can’t think of anything beneficial to say about the product then perhaps you might want to rethink promoting it altogether).
Of course it is possible to make some money by sending rather sparse, obvious emails, but it does seem an awful lot of work … burning your way through nearly all of your list every month and having to commit huge amounts of resources to replacing people you’ve treated like a battery hen instead of an intelligent human being who wants, just like you, to generate an income online.
In fact, to somebody like me who still converses with, or works alongside, many of the same people I have for the last ten (or more) years, those sort of ‘smash and grab’ tactics all seem more than a little unnecessary…
Until Next Time,
Publisher, Tim’s Business Lowe Down